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Marriage: How to Improve a Relationship

Photo credit: @mishandkirk

Staying in a relationship takes courage, patient, love, and respect.

They say being married is the most beautiful thing that will happen to your life. But no one said that staying married is the hardest part of all. Why?

Well, there are happy times, and there are sad times, but in between are the petty stuff. And the petty stuff when pile up becomes a big problem that sometimes can break a marriage.

So, how do you improve a relationship?

Here are some 5 tips on how to improve your relationship as a married couple! 1. Commitment Marriage is a lifetime commitment. According to Thomas Bradbury, a professor at UCLA, commitment could mean two things. Either you like your relationship right now, and you’d like to continue it, or you want a more profound commitment to that someone by means of working the relationship. And marriage falls on the latter. Being committed is easy, but staying committed takes a lot of courage, emotions, patience, respect, and love. 2. Have a date night. Cleaning the house, taking kids to school, doing some laundry, or working daily — are a few of the reasons why some married couples don’t have time for each other. When you are just a couple, you may have a lot of time together, but as you begin to have your own family, your kids become your priority. And it’s very typical. Have a movie date or candlelight dinner or even Netflix date — take some time off. Having this kind of stuff would spice up your relationship. It is maybe a simple thing that you can do, but the happiness it gives you would last.  “Relationship won’t work without time investment. Never have, never will.” — Joshua Becker of Becoming Minimalist.

3. Patience and Forgiveness.  There is no such thing as a perfect marriage or a perfect couple. We make mistakes.

It’s easy to forgive but difficult to forget. And it’s not easy. Successful couples learn not to hold grudges and bring back the past. They learn to have unending patience and forgiveness towards their partners. It may take some time to forget, but remember that you married an imperfect person — so did your spouse. A mistake should never be a reason to give up your marriage. 4. Talk about your finances. “For richer or for poorer. Till death do us part.” Is your partner the only one working for a living for the family or for the both you? I know some couples feel uncomfortable talking about finances, but it shouldn’t be. Financial problems are difficult and stressful. Couples should take some time to talk about their finances. They should be on the same page. Budgeting for some might be difficult, especially when you’re not used to it. And it’s even more difficult to budget when you don’t have the money. Monthly grocery budget, savings, investment, health care, educational plan for the kids, and emergency funds — these are just things that you need to talk about. 5. Communicate with one another. How many times did you have a misunderstanding with your partner because of miscommunication?  Before my husband and I got married, a lot of times, we had misunderstandings, like a lot, then we’ll argue afterward. When he would ask me what’s the problem, I would not talk to him for a few days or even a week. Yep, I used to be like that! As our relationship grows, we grow as an individual as well. We learn to be more patient to one another and understand that we both are different people. Communication is always the key to every relationship. In an article written by Mitch Temple on Focus on the family, he gave ten principles that he learned from working and observing married couples. One of the things he observed is that happiness is not the most important thing. According to him, though everyone wants to be happy, happiness comes and goes. Quite right, in my opinion. The reason for this is that a successful couple learns to do things that will bring their happiness back when life gets hard. Married couples can go through a lot of ups and downs. But at the end of the day, you should remember your “WHY”, why you chose to marry your partner.  A relationship is not only for couples out there — dating or married ones. It could also be a relationship between family, friends, colleagues, and even spiritual relationship. 

So, my question to you, how are you going to improve your relationship with your partner or with your family? Comment down below, I’d love to hear it!



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DISCLAIMER: In no way is Eden Busani, Founder of Meraki claiming to be a certified coach, therapist or evaluator. Eden Busani is a life "Guide" or "Advisor".